D. Day! The Outlaw, 1st July 2012

For some ridiculous reason even after such a long day yesterday and an even longer bike ride, I woke up at 6.15am this morning, so thought I'd do something useful and write this.

Sooo, after waiting 7 long months it was finally here! The night before I got all my stuff ready, and planned to get up at 4.30am, have breakfast and take my time and leave at 5.15am to get there to watch the start. Because of my atrocious sleeping patterns I was obsessed with not waking up on time or not hearing the alarm, so I kept checking it. I woke naturally at 4.20. Then the next thing I remember was jumping up with a start, looking at my phone and seeing it was 5.15. Hence a mad rush and no breakfast. Typical.

I arrived at the start and loaded up my bike, then went to watch the swim. The lake was (unusually) flat, and the sun had risen. It was a lovely sight. I had a pang of sadness that I wasn't there. The horn sounded and the washing machine of arms and legs commenced.

The swimmer for our relay team had told me to expect him around 1.15 or 1.20, so I was quite surprised when he popped up much sooner than that! Almost 15 minutes sooner!
He passed the chip over and I was off. A camera was following me, so getting the bike and holding my top with all the gels in, I tried desperately to look like I knew what I was doing, and concentrated on smiling and not falling over.

Going round to the opposite part of the lake, it was straight into a headwind, but I didn't worry too much, because it's always windy round there. 'It'll be ok once I'm on the road' I thought. HA! If only I knew!

The first few miles were generally uneventful, I had a lot of people passing me. It was rather disheartening at times, I felt really crap! I was in a bit of a thing with a man on a bike with a disc wheel called David, we kept passing each other. I was better on the flat and going up undulations, and he was better on the rough bits and into the headwind. I saw a few people from my club as they went by which was nice, I had expected that, and it gave me something else to focus on. On the north loop at one point, I don't know if it was the road surface or the wind or uphill or what, but I couldn't get over 13mph. I just felt shocking, like the energy had been sucked out of me. My quads cramped everytime I tried to go faster. Obviously this was quite concerning, I wasn't even close to halfway yet! I haven't been 100% for a while now, and at that point I thought it was coming back to bite me. Eventually though I did start to feel better, but I did find the north loop generally quite difficult. The wind was relentless.

Onto the south loops I hoped the wind wouldn't be as bad. Mm. Unfortunately not. It was, and it didn't stop. At mile 50 I took ibuprofen, because my quads and my shoulder had completely seized up, I think I was expending so much extra energy just fighting the wind that it was having an effect. I rode the bike harder than I ever did in training, because obviously in training I had to imagine I was running a marathon after. I also spent a lot of time on the aerobars, again something I hadn't really done, because of my arm. It was so maddening that all the effort I was putting in was producing exactly the same result as if I was ambling along not trying! Bloody weather!!!

Anyway, I'm not going to even mention the wind again now, it just makes me annoyed. I'll mention my toilet habits instead! I had to go 3 times for a wee!! The first time I had just found a nice little enclosed bit, when someone from the club came past, saw me and shouted ''No one will see you go for a wee there!'' I started laughing, was quite impressed with the wit. It's a big thing for me to get my bum out, it just doesn't happen! All the training rides I think I've been once. That was it. By the third wee though I was fed up of it, I didn't want to stop! And to squat is bad enough, but to squat with sore jelly legs?! Awful! Had proper knee tremble! And when you try to have a quick wee and it just goes on forever.... and you try to push it out quicker and think, 'come on'!! but the wee will insist it takes it's time, and it's in there laughing to itself,  saying 'I haven't finished yet, kindly do not rush me' and the knees are just worried they won't hold you up anymore, so they start to protest too.
The third time I stopped I went in a field that had these plant things all in rows. I don't know what they were, but if you're a farmer and you find I gave your turnips or whatever some extra fermentation, I'm really sorry! A girls' gotta do what a girls' gotta do...

I had to take more ibuprofen at mile 87, just as I approached two people jumping up and down shouting my name. It shows what state of mind you can go into. I have been in her car numerous times. Didn't recognise it. I train with her week in, week out, but really didn't know who she was. I was so out of it and fuzzy by then that all focus is put into keeping going. I finally realised who they were, and smiled and waved. It crossed my mind as I passed that I should have asked for a lift!

As I came to the end of the ride it started throwing it down. Nice. I was so glad just to get back, pass the chip on and go and get some food.

After eating I went to go to the club tent to get my bag and go and have a shower. As I approached some steps I thought, 'This may be slippy with cycling shoes on'. I was right, it was slippy, and I went straight down, straight onto my hip bone, elbow, and head. luckily I had my helmet loosely on. It reeeeeeally f*****g hurt. And I said exactly that to the two people who came to help me. Today I have a huge graze and bruise, and I can't bend my leg. I took my cycling shoes off after that.

After my shower I went back to the tent to cheer on the others on the course. I did wish several times that I had just done it, because I felt ok, I wasn't particularly tired or anything, I felt I could have kept going. But, I suppose in hindsight it's always easy to say that, and a marathon is a long way. I'd also had to take painkillers just to get through the bike, not a great sign.

I have to say it was a lovely day, a lovely experience, and we still got a medal and a t.shirt for doing the relay, which I was thrilled with. Always love a medal!! I wish I had got my moment, but it will come.
It was lovely to see everyone I knew who had entered finish, and there was just a sense of camaraderie and support, of people really coming together. It was great to be there and see the culmination of months and months of hard work, sacrifice and the pursuit of the ultimate triathlon challenge. Not many people would dream of doing it. A man on the bike said to me as he passed, ''Isn't it weird that most people have just got out of bed, and we're here doing this, why..."

I don't think there is a definitive reason why, for each has their own personal reasons, but at the heart of it, I think everyone who did the race yesterday, everyone who has said no to that extra beer, got up at 5am to do a 2 hour run in the cold before work, everyone who didn't give up, against all odds, I think at the heart of it, we all want to be the very best we can be. And we all are. Congratulations to every single person who completed yesterday. I am in awe of you all.


*dum, dum, dum,..* I look into the window, of my mind, reflections of the fears I know I've left behhhhhind, so I step out of the ordinary, I can feel my soul ascending, I'm on my way, can't stop me now, you can do the saaaaaaame, yeah, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TODAY TO MAKE YOU FEEL PROUD......